Serendipity...

I know some don't believe in fate and destiny. Some only believe that something happens, we make a choice, and go from there. I came across an older movie called Serendipity with John Cusack. He has always been one of my favorite actors but this movie has stuck with me for many years. The funny part is, I don't follow the idea, just the love story.

  Just think, those who believe in God always say "Let go, and Let God". People who are laid back and casual about life say, "just go with the flow". There are several different variations of this. I realized today how much I love this word.  It is peaceful, it is releasing, it is calm. I need calm. I need to stay in the now. So, I looked for inspiration, love, luck, friends...all my life. I'm tired. I think of it as a new challenge. Watching that movie today, I realized it was the idea and NOT the love story today that caught my attention. It was like I was watching an entirely different movie. Think about it. There is a youthful excitement to thinking that good things do come when you don't look for them. What if my first thought every day was ‘I wonder what good is going to come my way today?’  What if the day starts off with HOPE and BELIEVING in something...something positive and good.

I consider the alternative. I can wrestle, and plan, and manipulate all the situations I want. In the end, I am the one who is tired. I am the one who comes to the point of something being unacceptable. That's where I am then tired and frustrated. If I wake up filled with hope and belief that things work themselves out as long as I am taking care of me and staying in the moment doing what is directly in front of me, I relax, my shoulders relax, my teeth don't clinch, and my toe doesn't twitch. (Yes, I have a toe twitch problem. Just that one big toe on my left foot goes about 60 mph when I'm stressing).

See, it doesn't matter that I want to help the doctors fix me and find the right formula...TODAY. I will only wear myself out by being impatient. It makes no difference that I want to control how someone feels about me. I only scratch the wound that it creates a huge sore that only I suffer from. I can tell the profile determination department my sob story all day long and it won't change the decisions. I am the only one who gets a headache from crying and pleading. I know these are all my first reactions, I am just tired of the outcome and realization that it doesn't work for me. Today I chose a different way. If I get up, think positive, take care of myself, take my medicine and follow through with my responsibilities, I make ME happy. I feel good...and I chose to believe that all that other stuff will work itself out. JUST LIKE IT'S SUPPOSED TO. :)